Thursday, May 20, 2010

Can you at least pretend you're a real Starbucks?

Dramatic scene at "Starbucks" in Barnes and Noble.

ME:            Double tall non-fat latte, please.
Barista #1:  Do you want to make that a Grande?!?
ME:            Why?
Barista #1:   umm...I don't know.  No one's ever asked me why...
Lady in Line:  Because you get more!!
ME:            A double tall has the same amount of espresso as a grande. {sigh}
Barista #1:  umm, you get more milk in a Grande and I don't like the taste of coffee!
ME:             I do like coffee and I'll stick with my original order.
Barista #2:  So that'll be a double tall, Sunshine?
ME (Sunshine):  Yes.
Barista #2:   Here's your double tall non-fat extra delicious latte!

Dude, when did you hear me ask for extra delicious?  I believe I have the authority vested in me, as someone who has spent every dime she's made in the last 5 years on espresso, to strip you of your Starbucks aprons, morons.  And don't call me Sunshine.


The Mike said...

There's nothing wrong with a little sunshine with your coffee. I prefer a triple shot in my super grande, hot enough to turn your tongue to plasma, otherwise flavourless but frothy coffee in a paper cup with a silly looking logo.

When my wife began spending all that money on Starfucks, I bought her one of those machines that makes everything she could possibly want (except breakfast in bed, which she really doesn't like anyway. Did I get lucky or what?). She loves the machine. I don't have to stand in line for espresso (doppio). If only I could get someone to call me sunshine.

Olivejenny said...

(Note to self: Don't call Not Stacy "Sunshine") (out loud) ;)

Mike, you are sunshine. A dark, sharp ray of sunshine. :D

As for Starbucks, my captcha word is "inlib."

susan said...

There is actually a PA with the last name Sunshine at the hospital.

Starbucks is my drug.